It was almost 3 years ago that I first heard Goddess Haylee’s voice as I watched her YouTube video. I really liked it. So I got the freebee Desperately Aching. I listened to it every chance I got. After less than a month I realized that this was not some role play game. This was real and if I continued I would end up losing myself completely. I would be totally owned and controlled by this woman with the sweetest, most powerful, compelling, blissful voice I had ever heard. I wanted it desperately. I knew I needed it. And those of you who know my story know, it scared the shit out of my and I ran away for more than a year.
But I came back last November. I knew where this path leads, but this time I didn’t run. My resistance was immense. I didn’t realize even how much resistance I had. But Goddess Haylee is relentless. She sees all resistance and breaks it down. The more I listen, the more I read, the more I watch, the more I only want to surrender and be her totally devoted slave. I am addicted to her and I couldn’t leave her if I wanted to, and I do not want to.
I find myself at the next stage in my growth as Goddess Haylee’s slave – commitment, submission, obedience. Last night I saw her post on Follow+ that said if I wanted to massage her feet, paint her toenails and be her footstool that I was to tip $10. I did want to so I did click on tip. Nothing happened because my credit card wasn’t linked to my Follow+ account yet. I thought no biggie, it’s just $10. But it haunted me all night. My Goddess, my Mistress, had told me to tip $10. But I told myself, “It’s only $10.” But if I am not faithful and obedient in small things, how will Goddess ever be able to count on me to be obedient with big things? This morning I just had to fix my Follow+ account and tip Goddess $10.
So I am now facing overcoming the resistance to being totally obedient to Goddess Haylee. I have no doubt she will win. She always gets what she wants. And I want to be the one to give it to her. All for Haylee.
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